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Click here"Uhm, yeah. Thanks."
Mom was right. He was acting weird. We don't see each other often, maybe six or seven times a year and then only for an hour or two. Dad was being almost confrontational while he was usually super laid back.
"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?"
"You still have my old mitts?"
"Sure. And a couple of bats. Need 'em for Jeremiah?"
"Yeah."
"Closet in the office. Towards the rear."
"Thanks."
I found two of my old mitts, a few balls, and a bat that would be too heavy for him.
"Thanks, Dad."
"Not a problem. They're yours. Take them or leave them. Gonna stay for a beer?"
"No, gotta get going. Another time."
"Yeah, that works for me."
I was halfway down the porch stairs when I paused. Going back to the door, I opened it and walked in. He looked up from the fridge where he was pulling out ingredients for dinner.
"Forget something?"
I paused before answering. "Yeah. What'd you mean 'works for you'?"
"Nothing. Forget it. Stefania's going to be home soon. Gotta get dinner started."
Standing there, I thought about his attitude. There was definitely something off. "No, seriously, what did you mean?"
He leaned against the refrigerator door. "Okay, you want to do this? I meant you stopping by for under five minutes works for me. Our relationship works for me. Look, you're my son and I love you. That's not going to change. But right now, I'm finding it hard to like you. It's been that way for a while."
I was stunned. "Wow, Dad. Why don't you tell me how you really feel?"
"Don't give me that bullshit and don't get flippant with me. There are parts of the boy that I raised still in you, but it's getting drowned by the asshole you've become. You made this choice, Brandon. You created this distance. I've just grown to appreciate it is all."
"That... That's not true. I'm just busy. I've got the clinic and the stuff with Jeremiah and, yeah, other stuff."
"I don't know if you're BS'ing me or yourself, but you're full of shit. You have disdain for me. More importantly, you're afraid you'll become like me, as if being a cuck is contagious. Let me explain some shit to you. I don't need your approval and I don't need your constant sneer every time we're together and you remember how your mother treated me. I was there. I don't need a fucking reminder.
"I had a little boy who needed his mother, so yeah, I took her back. More than once. Did you know that I stopped sleeping with her after the first time? I went years without. Years! When she finally left us, I kept giving her money. Nothing big, but enough to keep her on the line. You know why? Because it was a tether, Brandon. If she thought she could get money from me, she would stay in your life. Know when that stopped? The day you turned 18. The. Very. Fucking. Day."
I stood there, mouth open, staring at him. Who was this guy and where did my weak, mild father go?
"I put up with her shit for years and I did it for you. I'm not asking for a medal or a pat on the back, but I'll be damned if I'm going to take any more of you looking down your nose at me. Stefania's the love of my life. We're good together. I have her, she has me and we're happy. She's my family. If you and I see each other at Thanksgiving and Christmas and then a few times through the year, I'll be okay with that."
He stood there staring right back at me. I swallowed a couple of times before speaking. "Dad, I, uh, I don't look down at you. I..."
"For fuck's sake, Brandon, at least be honest. You do look down on me and you have since you were a teen. You couldn't stand me and didn't want to be like me. So, instead you became like her. You spend your time with married women so there's no entanglements. No risk of getting hurt. They can't abandon you like your mother abandoned us if they don't mean anything to you.
The truth is, you've become a predator and a coward. Did I disgust you, Brandon? For trying to keep my son's mother in his life? Well, rest assured, I know what that's like because your behavior turns my stomach. Strip everything away, remove all the psychological bullshit and it boils down to this; you're an asshole. You're more than happy to help destroy other people's marriages because you're afraid of getting hurt."
You know, I've actually seen people about you. When you stopped going for therapy, I started. I was trying to figure you out, what made you tick. I got some good insights. In addition to protecting yourself, it was suggested that every time you were with some married woman you were taking a shot at me. Like it was a deliberate swipe at me. How fucking juvenile is that?"
There was an emptiness, a hollow feeling in my stomach. He was completely wrong. It was just that married women were easier. They... I don't know, but it wasn't what he was saying. It wasn't. It couldn't be.
"Dad, that's crazy. I didn't know why you put up with her and I'm sorry if I made you feel like I had no respect for you, but... Shit. I don't know. This is a lot. Can we, maybe, get a drink or something? Maybe tomorrow? I need to think about this."
"No, I don't think so, Brandon."
"Okay. Tuesday?"
"Brandon, there are parts of you that I like." He nodded towards the baseball equipment. "This stuff with Jeremiah. The work you do. How much you care about your patients. But you're getting worse. You're circling the drain here and you need some help. I think it would be best if we kept our distance until you see someone. I can't force you anymore, but you need to talk to a therapist. You were fucking a woman whose husband's a cop. That's either a suicide attempt or a cry for help. Maybe both. It was also just a punk move. I love you, son, but I truly don't like you much. Make an effort to change and I'll be there for you. Every step of the way. But until then, I think I need some distance. How many of these women had kids? How many of them had kids that were around your age when your mother started fucking around? See a therapist, Brandon. You need to get your shit together."
I shook my head. Fuck him. "I'm sorry you feel that way, Dad. I really am. But I'll respect your decision. Maybe it would have been a better choice to allow me to have a role model who stood up for himself even if it caused me to lose a mother who was barely there. Your shrink friends ever bring that up? I'll see you around, Dad. Say hi to Stefania. Reach out if you change your mind."
"Get some help, Brandon."
He said it to my back as I walked out the door and away from my father.
++++++
++++++
Three days. Three fucking days and I still couldn't sleep. I tried drinking. I tried supplements. I hate pills and I still took a sleep aid. Nothing was helping. Laying there, I'd just stare at the ceiling as the minutes and then the hours slipped by like a geriatric sloth.
My father hated me. My partner thought I was a dick and his wife loathed me. I was losing a business I had built from the ground up. The kid I was supposed to be helping to live a better life than I had was growing up just like me. I had no friends and the only adult I got along with was my mother who I was learning that I deeply and truly despised.
I couldn't maintain an erection, I couldn't sleep, I jumped at loud noises and I was starting to think I was getting an ulcer.
It was becoming clear that I was getting my wish. I was becoming just like my mother. I despised my mother, so let the self-loathing roll.
After some copious use of Visine and two Monsters for breakfast, I drove down to Lake Pueblo State Park and the reservoir and sat in the parking lot waiting for Pueblo Pioneer Psychology to open. They were only a few blocks away, so I tried to enjoy the view for a while.
At five to nine I began driving over. It simultaneously felt like I was speeding over there, and it was taking forever. In reality, I never broke 30. Parking, I stared at the door. I couldn't make myself get out of the car. I was feeling a little light-headed and thought I might start hyperventilating.
Castigating myself, I punched my thigh twice, told myself to man-up, and got out. Walking to the door adjacent to the main entrance, I walked in. It was a private practice that was associated with the larger Pueblo Pioneer Psychology. Freezing again, I stopped. After a minute, I walked up to the desk.
The woman looked up at me with a bright smile. "Good morning! Welcome to Dr. Mallay's office. Can I help you?"
"Yeah. I, uh, I think," I swallowed hard, blinked twice, and then continued. "I think I need some help."
A short man who looked like he should be working on the docks, Dr. Mallay was not the soft and cuddly type. He was built like a barrel and looked like he wrestled bears on his days off. That was fine. I'd coddled myself for way too long.
I was still drawing a salary, but Jared and I had agreed on his buying me out. As soon as I received the check, I'd be off their books and on my own. Spending the time trying to get a grip on whatever was wrong with me, I was seeing Dr. Mallay three times a week and I signed up to coach Little League.
I dragged Jeremiah down to the practices with me. It was the pee-wees and he moaned and grumbled but I saw how he basked in the attention of the younger kids. Things were going smoothly until another team approached. A bunch of eight-year-olds and a few guys in blue, long-sleeved tees that had "Police Athletic League" emblazoned on the back.
One of them checked his phone and looked up. "Hey, no rush, but I think we have the field from 3:00 to 6:00."
"Yeah, no problem, Coach." Turning towards the field, I called out. "Okay, guys, let's bring it in."
As Jeremiah and I were packing up my car, one of the guys in the blue shirts approached.
"Look, I don't want any trouble, okay? We're just here for the kids. Can we just handle shit somewhere else, another time?"
He stood there looking at me for a minute. "I was going to ask if you're that guy, but I guess you are."
"Yeah, I guess I am."
"Real dick move, dude."
"Yeah, I guess it was. Jeremiah, wait in the car."
He did, reluctantly.
"You working with these kids?"
It was a stupid question, but I wasn't going to tell him that. "Yeah, me and Jeremiah. They needed a coach."
He nodded. "So, you could have gotten Phil and Charlie kicked off the force. That's a given. I heard you didn't even sue. That true?"
"I... Yeah. Listen, I just want to get all that shit behind me, okay? Just, I don't know, I was wrong. I get it. They took a shot, they were probably friends of his. I can respect that, I guess. They didn't have a history or anything. It was just better to walk away. I didn't need the money or any more shit on my conscience."
"Right. Okay." He paused. "Listen, maybe we can get like a scrimmage game with your kids or something. Here's my card. Give me a yell."
That was the last thing I expected. I took his card, shook his hand and was still in a daze when I dropped Jeremiah off at his foster home.
"Brandon, you okay?"
"What? Oh, yeah. Sure. Fine. You good? You need any money?"
"I can make it to the end of the week, but if you buy a pizza at Angelos on Wednesday and you get it with everything, you get a free two-liter of Pepsi."
"Uh-huh. A twenty would cover it?"
"Maybe twenty-five?"
I laughed and gave him 30.
One of the kids on our team had an older sister. Brianne was about Jeremiah's age and she began coming to most of the practices and all of the games. She seemed nice enough and Jeremiah told me that they started meeting at the mall. With her mother's permission, Brianne joined us when I took Jeremiah for pizza or burgers after practices.
I was glad to see him with one girl that he was treating respectfully and was happy to talk to her when Brianne's mother approached me when I was alone.
"Coach, you're Jeremiah's brother? There seems to... I don't mean to be rude, but there's an age gap there."
I laughed. "Yeah, sorry. I'm his Big Brother. From Big Brothers, Big Sisters."
She paused for a moment. "Like, for single parents who need help with their kids and stuff?"
"Well, yeah, I guess. For kids who can use an adult in their life."
"So, what's Jeremiah's situation?"
There was a tilt to her head or a shift of her torso that started niggling at the back of my brain. Something had fundamentally changed in the past few seconds.
"He's a foster kid."
She looked from Mercedes and back to me. "So, you're not related? At all? And he lives in some sort of group home?"
There was barely disguised disgust dripping from her tone.
"Yeah. A foster home. They have a couple of kids there. The people that took them in, well, they're fu... freaking heroes. Some of the nicest people I've ever met in my life. Is there something I should know?"
"No, of course not. I'm sure they are wonderful people. I was just thinking that maybe Jeremiah and Brianne might be moving a bit too fast. Maybe they need to slow down."
That what you thought when you believed that I was his well-heeled brother? Or just now that he's an orphan in a foster home? The brother of Doctor Coach was good enough for your daughter but plain old Jeremiah isn't?
"Well, that's your call to make, I guess. To be honest, I doubt that they are doing anything more serious than some light kissing, but do what you have to. Jeremiah's a good kid and Brianne's lucky to be spending time with him. They're both lucky."
"Yes, of course. Well, it was good speaking with you."
Great, bitch.
Brianne stopped showing up at games. I took Jeremiah to "Mookie's House of Taco's" after the game. He looked at the sign and over at me with a 'what the heck' look. I shrugged my shoulders and we went in.
The girl at the counter seemed friendly. "Welcome to Mookie's, featuring 10 salsas! We don't sell Dr. Pepper. What can I get for you?"
We ordered and took a seat.
"Brianne's mom said she can't see me."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. I heard them arguing. She said I wasn't suitable. What does that even mean? I think it's 'cause I don't have a mom and dad."
"No, I'm sure you heard wrong."
"I don't think so. I'm not good enough 'cause I'm a foster kid."
I took a bite of a taco to buy myself some time. After swallowing and taking a swig of my iced tea, I responded.
"Hey, I... I sort of need to fess up. I got into an argument with her. She wanted Jimmy to pitch and play short. I told her that I was the coach and I'd be making the decisions. We went back and forth for a while and it got sort of bad. I think she sort of hates me and took it out on you."
"What the fuck, man? I really liked her!"
"Yeah, I get that. Watch the cursing. I didn't think it would blow over to you, but it did. It's on me, not you. It had nothing to do with you not being good enough or anything."
"You... You can be a real... I can't even curse! Dammit, Brandon! Think about someone else once in a while, all right?"
"Yeah. My bad. We good?"
"No." He paused. "Yes. I really liked her. I mean really, really liked her."
"I get it. I'm sorry. If it helps, that cashier was checking you out."
"It doesn't help."
He kept looking at her when he thought I was preoccupied. After the next practice he asked if we could go back to Mookie's.
We did have that scrimmage with the PAL team and it went well. The cops that were coaches were all civil and a few shook my hand after the game. Janelle ran the food kiosk and the money went to the local PTA. We'd talk after practices and the games. I'd wind up buying some food for myself and waters for the kids. After the first two weeks, I asked her out. A widow, her husband had died in a car accident five years earlier when their daughter was three.
Her little girl, Anna, began watching our practices and games, always within view of Janelle. After the fourth time she came over, I called out to her.
"Anna, I have this extra glove. You wanna give it a shot?"
We began playing catch before and after practices and soon she was on the team. The kids had just gotten off of tee-ball and she was one of our best hitters. Jeremiah saw me working with her and made it a point to show her how to swing through the ball and maintain her stance. He also put an end to any of the boys on the team grumbling at the girl who hit better than they did.
I don't think it went unnoticed when I praised him for looking out for her.
I was down to once a week with Dr. Mallay. He had that infuriating method of allowing me to draw my own conclusions from our discussions and rarely gave me concrete answers. Dr. Mallay insisted that we were way too early in the process for that and when the time was right he'd let me know where he stood. I thought it was Socratic bullshit.
From what I could gather, my father was right. I was hiding and not allowing myself to be hurt by being with women who weren't truly available and weren't looking for anything meaningful themselves. It became very uncomfortable when he asked if any of the married women I'd been with had children around the same age I was when my mother started stepping out.
In short, I was an asshole who didn't care if I put other people's marriages in danger if it made me feel more secure when I got my rocks off.
I didn't want to be that way anymore.
The baseball season was over and school was out when I decided to pick up the phone.
"Hello, Brandon. Everything okay?"
"Yeah, Dad. Everything's all right. I, uh, I just sort of missed you, you know?" I found myself blinking a lot. "You... You think maybe we could get that drink?"
There was a long, terrifying pause.
"Okay. Tomorrow at Riverside Bar? 7:00?"
I smiled. "Yeah, Dad. That would be great. Bring Stefania."
"I will. We'll see you there."
"Dad?"
"Yeah?"
"Thanks."
"Okay. We'll see you tomorrow."
When they walked through the door, I stood up so they could see me. We had a four-top in the back. It was close enough to the bar for good service, but quiet enough to talk. Stefania was a tall, statuesque blonde with brown eyes. Dad had done well. When they got to the table, I hugged her and Dad reached his hand out. I ignored it and hugged him as well.
"Dad, Stefania, I'd like you to meet Janelle."
++++++
++++++
I realize that I'm going to take a beating for this story. Brandon is an unlikable main character. He's an asshole when the story starts and less of an asshole when it ends. Some people are going to think that he didn't suffer enough. I get that. Some people aren't interested in a story about an immature prick. Not a problem. Flail away.
*
With thanks to Steve M and the folks at Spinoza Indexing. My gratitude is also extended to NoraFares for the editing.
Looking for something else to read? Try "Coming Home" by Lunette. She's a talented writer and fairly new. Click HERE
Not a bad story and I liked it the further I got into the story. Different for sure and hopefully there is some redemption for his past sins. Just hope he's honest with Janelle.
What is wrong with this story is the fact he didn't sue the police,arseholes like those two shouldn't be in public service,,unless they were bin men.
If there's no hope and redemption for a louse there's no hope or redemption for any. Thanks everybody needs hope...
Too much and too little. Never could get invested in the story or characters. Hard to figure out what the hell the story was about. Got tired of reading it and jumped to end but still didn’t help. Loved a lot of your stories but not this one. LM
Im worried that jeremiah is gonna end up being a predator that needs exterminating; "She's hot. I'm gonna hit it and quit it." Personal baggage never goes away, the burden it poses may diminish but its always there, like a bad habit and under stress one may revert back to destructive behavior. rk
The MC’s father chose poorly. He was wrong. The boy would have been better off without a mother figure at all rather than the example of womanhood he was given.
ZK
Sorry, you made MC that big of an “axxhole” I just couldn’t com back from it. One star only.
It is an excellent story. I liked it. If someone criticized you for having an imperfect MC, then they must be perfect or kidding tgemselves. We all carry some baggage from our past, some people more that others. Brandon was working on his baggage and trying to change. That is uplifting. May more assholes do the same.
There's an old saying, "There but for the grace of God go I". We all carry baggage from our childhood. For some people it's a valise and for some it's a cargo container. It's up to us to downsize our baggage and get it off our back. Brandon was working on it. Let's be clear - it's not fucking easy. Worthwhile story.
LMJ
Reading #4 (or maybe #5) and it's still a page-turner for me. Brandon was blessed to learn how to be a half-way decent man while he was still young; I was well into my 70s and still have much to learn, perhaps too much for the time to be. Thank you again, Bebop, for gracing us with the fruits of your talent.
Great story. Brandon having growth was good. Self awareness was great. And he didn't have a perfect ending - he lost his friend and had to put the work in.
The real irredeemable people were the gleeful partners who just kept cheating remorselessly. And the sanctimonious mom.
Great stuff.
Me,never mind the fact that Brandon is an arsehole,he didn't deserve to be jumped by the cops.After the way they had been harassing him, he should have sued the police and had them fired.They are paid to uphold the law not take it in to their own hands.Too many of them stray off track.
Some of us think that the cop’s friends should have been looking for ways to hurt the slut wife, since she was the one who betrayed him!
well written, good story and ending. Yes, he was an asshole and splinted family life, but maybe overcomes it. Also like that you drew in Foster Kids and Big Brother Sisters. World needs more of them
There are excellent stories that don’t have likable characters. Yeah, the MC was an asshole and at the end, he was a slightly better asshole. Doesn’t change the fact that this was an excellent story. Very well developed characters.
tomato tomahto, haters can call this a story about an asshole, I prefer a story about redemption. the ending was subtle I can see how some readers were confused.
My second time through this tale. Many folks may not dig deep enough to fully appreciate the tale (or not be willing to admit the close call to their own life/ personality. Eighteen is the legal age of adulthood but of course many don't grow up till much later if at all. I like seeing the MC seeing himself as others do and finally becoming a real man (I think it was around age 48 in my case). Thank you for your story!
somewhere east of Omaha
Good story. You write stories in an effort to do new things. Writing stories about unlikeable characters is hard.
People criticize your characters, but they are REAL. At least in your world view. This is an author's purview. I know characters like this in real life. Your character are polarizing, but you spin a good yarn. For this you have my respect.
"You have disdain for me. More importantly, you're afraid you'll become like me, as if being a cuck is contagious."
While I feel the father's pain, I have to side with the asshole Brandon at this point, because the dad was wrong. He raised a man while acting as a doormat to a hoe. Of course that's going to have an impact on a growing boy. Why do you think mother's are told to get rid of abusive husbands. Because children see that shit and assume that's what a marriage looks like. Of course Brandon wouldn't know how to cope with having a cuck father. Who would honestly?
If the dad was raising a daughter the same way, she would've ended up exactly like the mother and that would also have been his fault as well. In this case alone Brandon is right, he needed a father and a role model. All he got was a cuck and a broken man.
This is why I'm childfree. if this asshole was my son i'd cut him off and never speak to him again even if he was on his deathbed. I'd cut off my right arm if it treated me half as badly as that father was treated
Hmmm...am troubled by the MC's decision to mislead Jeremiah about the reason Brianne's mother stopped her from spending time with him. Understandable that he wanted to spare the young man's feelings but people from disadvantaged socioeconomic circumstances sadly face discrimination in all aspects of life. The sooner they learn to see this prejudice for what it is, the sooner they can begin to respond to it effectively. It sucks but such is life. Develop the skills to succeed despite the bigotry as early in life as possible.
Interesting story. Probably as true-to- life as many of the other stories here, and even more-so than some of them. Not much of a fun read but it does kinda make you wonder what makes a dirtbag like Brandon tick. 5⭐️s.
I didn’t like the way it started out but that was the whole point of the story but by the end I was cheering for the MC, The MC father’s sacrifices, where an inspiration for all fathers who have found themselves in a similar situation ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
It takes guts to write a story in the category that'll get you eaten alive for anything less than BTB. Thanks...
I sort of got lost in the beginning when he got beat up a kid with an ASP. That was finally explained later on. I guess I've gotten to used the wives being being the bad guys getting taken down by what used to be loving husbands. I was a good story and showed hoe some with destructive tendencies in relationships can change with the right help. Good story and well thought out. Mookie's was touch from Needles and Delaney?? 5 stars
I sort of got lost in the beginning when he got beat up a kid with an ASP. That was finally explained later on. I guess I've gotten to used the wives being being the bad guys getting taken down by what used to be loving husbands. I was a good story and showed hoe some with destructive tendencies in relationships can change with the right help. Good story and well thought out. Mookie's was touch from Needles and Delaney?? 5 stars
Really good story with interesting character development. The next phases of hi development would be really interesting. He seems to have got to the good-intentions stage. How much damage will he do as he moves to good action? He might well take up with someone nice, vulnerable and actualy incompatible, does he risk getting out or does he not dare, and if so what happens as he gets colder towatds her? Or .... As someone said, your great at character development, and I would have loved you to follow up with this one.
Third reading
of this master class in how to make an unlikeable MC become somewhat less unlikeable and possibly redeemable, not to mention creating complex supporting characters (Mom and Dad) who defy simple characterization. The only thing I can't forgive is letting Dr. Pepper sit and get warm instead of surreptitiously pouring it on the nearest plant that needs to die.
A thoroughly unlikeable protagonist, but a well-written story. I'd love to see further growth...
Good writing, but bailed out 1/2 way. Couldn't get into the main character....just a bit too unlikable.
Now see Bebop, this was excellent BUT you could have gone so much further with this. You have a tremendous talent for character development, especially when it comes to emotional growth, overcoming challenges and battling adversity. So what if the main character started off as a horrible person? No one is perfect and most people battle shame. Shame is a crippling condition and causes far more dysfunction than anyone ever wants to admit. I really feel like this story deserves another look. Everyone loves a romance and true love. They elicit dreams of that love of a lifetime. They are wonderful but rarely do they encourage introspection and change. Redemption tales do this. They encourage looking inward and give hope that growth and change is possible. More than that, they encourage action to thrive.
This was a lovely story. It has the potential to be your best. -starsong77
I wish the story could have been longer, would have loved a full redemption arc.
Great writing from Bebop to actually make the reader feel compassion for an unlikable asshole.
I think he was wrong not to sue the police who attacked him,they have no right to go around assaulting people just to show solidarity with their mates.
"Mom had never been what you would call domestic and subsided on frozen food." I'm trying to picture that! You mean subsisted, of course.
So if Brandon was Brandy instead. And she broke up some marriages sleeping around, would the comments be as sympathetic and understanding ?
Lovely story. If we cannot believe in personal growth and learning from mistakes then we should just either close all prisons or lock everyone up for ever depending on your viewpoint. We should also hold all mistakes against someone even if they made them when they were hormone infused and immature teenagers....actually we do that one already on twitter. TC Ireland
Just reading through the comment, and see "full of unlikable characters", so the fuck what? Life's full of unlikable characters. And another: "try proofreading"; big fucking deal if every little word or sentence isn't William Shakespeare. It was a good story and I liked it. You'd think that all these shitheads were dragged kicking and screaming into a small room and forced to read these stories that people work hard on. Are mistakes made? Sure, they are, but jesus christ, can't they just let it go and enjoy what they can? BTW, if you want to write with no mistakes in the future, download Grammarly, as an add-on to Word, and you'll be golden (and it's free) . Happy writing!
The story was very good even with a flawed main character. The point was he became aware of his short comings (with some reinforcement) and was working to change. I've known people like Brandon, to many that never grew up. Bebops tale was like a slice of (fictional) real life and I enjoyed it very much. It was a welcome change!
somewhere east of Omaha
"subsided on frozen foods" - really? Try reading through properly. "Subsisted"
Sorry didn't go much for the unlikeable main character.
Seriously full of unlikable characters, yet somehow I enjoyed it anyway. I kinda felt sorry for Brandon. Was he an asshole? Sorta, but I can see how he never really got the chance to grow up. The dad was a bigger ass by letting the messed up mom stick around.
Really well done. Looking into the psychological aspects of cheating and how adults let their problems become their kids.
While the story made me uncomfortable it forced introspection and I think that’s a good thing.
Mission Accomplished
Perhaps he had an attitude problem,and a desire for married women,but that is no reason for getting beat up and harassed by the police.He should have sued the force and the two policemen ,they would have kept well away from him in the future.As for his partner and snotty wife,he should have set up practice in opposition to him.
It will happen again and what will Jeremiah d
Thanks to Bb3 for an engaging look into Brandon's psyche and its relationship to his behavior. I am amused that commentors focus on his negative aspects rather than his progress in improving himself. Like all of us real people Brandon is (so far) an incomplete story. BTW, where are all the comments whining that the story doesn't tie up all the issues and future events with a ribbon bow? Funny that...
Very interesting. Keep 'em comin'.
This story was just...depressing. And as the author said, the lead character was a self-absorbed prick. On top of that, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t find another main character in the story that I would piss on if he (or she) was on fire. I have no clue where this story is going, or if it’s just a one-off, but good luck with it, Bebop.
You dare to set aside the lascivious and salacious aspects of cheating, adultery, and predation of married spouses in favor of exploring its dismal screwed-up provenance.
Gosh all those SuperSeeds "ThugBunny"found and gave back to Mookie must be making him good BUCKS. Nice little throw-in.Good little read Human Psy. Enjoyed all you stories,thank you for your hard work.
I’m not much of a loving wives reader, it’s just not my cup of tea. That said, I didn’t feel like wasting my time looking for a new story and I like most of Bebop’s writing so here I am. The main protagonist is a dick, not a total dick, who undergoes a bit of a life change. It is a well written story, and kept me reading despite the subject matter.
Protagonist was an asshole, but at least he had a Freudian excuse. His dad was shit. The story itself mentions this, by way of protagonist's comment to his dad (maybe it would've been better to have a dad that stood up for himself as role model, even if it caused the loss of his barely-there mother).
And if that was dad's rationale, why did he stop giving mom money after son turned eighteen? Does he think children stop needing emotional support from their mother on their eighteenth birthday?
I'd have preferred for Brandon, after he got some help, to lay into his father hard, about all this.
Not what I read Literotica for, but an interesting tale. I liked how the plot changed as Brandon got help. ****
Disagree with his decision to not not sue the police.So he shagged a policeman's wife(it takes two to tango),but that doesn't give them the right to go round assaulting people.Also the incident would have been the talk of the force and the wife's husband would have learnt about her cheating.
Take a beating? By who? Christ, my eyes were glassy by the time I finished. Brandon’s character is a phenomenal piece of literary craftsmanship, and “Other People’s Problems” is one of the finest and most compelling short stories I’ve read in a long time.
Fifth comment, all others have disappeared, on this very good story. I enjoyed the depiction of a character not often explored in the LW stories. Talking about the other man, the cheating wife's partner. Brandon was deeply affected by his mother's cheating, and this colored all his relationships with women. It took a lot of hard knocks , and a Frank talk with his father to help him heal. Your story was difficult, but good to read.
Loved it. Sometimes people get tired of being a shit (or in this case an asshole). Growing up occurs at different times in people's lives and sometimes not at all. Growth is always hard, no matter if things are rosy when you are growing up, or not.
Thanks BeBop. Another good one.
Thank you for a thoughtful, character-driven story. We don’t get enough real character insight like this anymore.
Annie, give it a rest. Nobody is forced to do anything. First, you fools complain about being excluded, now you're saying that people are forced to write. Make up your mind.
Hello Annie!
"Did the Queen approve this story?
Just another less than average story from one of the puppets. You're even doing her usual job and having one of her exclusive "events." Was she able to force the usual suspects into writing to avoid being in her doghouse? You don't want to fall out of favour. You better write or Queen Randi will ruin your career."
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How's that obsession going for ya? I realize that you're a bit slow (you just have to read one of your stories to pick up on that), but you are aware that there were invite-only events prior to Randi, right?
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So, she ruins your 'career' if you don't write for her and (I'm assuming) you are a puppet if you participate in her events? Is that your contention? So, my career must have been ruined and I must not be a puppet. Check the participants list from her last event. Wait for her next event and check the participants list.
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The truth remains unchanged. I've said it before and I'll say it again. You're a jealous mediocrity who is likely just intelligent enough to discern that you are barely average. That has to be painful. You're a one-trick pony who is obsessed with your betters.
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Does your slavish devotion to everything Randi keep you warm at night? That's more than a little pathetic. Is it more pathetic than you posting as anonymous instead of the ID you post your stories under? I'm not sure. Both are just sad.
Just another less than average story from one of the puppets. You're even doing her usual job and having one of her exclusive "events." Was she able to force the usual suspects into writing to avoid being in her doghouse? You don't want to fall out of favour. You better write or Queen Randi will ruin your career.
I enjoyed it. Shows real development in your abilities. Something to be proud of.
Great story on a part of the cheating wife triangle that we don't read much about. The bastard she cheats with with. You took a real asshole and rehabilitated him into a real human being. It was interesting to learn that another cheating wife, his mother, was the major influence shaping him into the man he wasn't. It took some help, but he may make it. Great story.